9 simple tips for a stress free Philippine vacation.
Posted on July 29, 2007
Filed Under Travel, Living in the Philippines, Long Distance Relationships, Uncategorized |
Rare thinking people like you already know much of what you’ll discover in the next 2 minutes. I will uncover for you 9 simple tips to make your first visit in the Philippines stress free.
The first 3 tips for a first time traveler are:
1. Leave your western mentality at home! I’ve said this time and time again…and for the most part it’s never been challenged and I doubt it ever will. Common sense, gut instinct and a sense of adventure will be the the 3 character traits you need when visiting the Philippines.
2. There’s no way to understand the Filipino mindset. After all it’s a completely different culture with their own set of laws, rules, and protocol. You best bet is to learn is and go along with what you feel comfortable with and be discerning with what you disregard.
3. Don’t even try understanding at least not in the beginning Your main mission in the beginning will be to get to know the Filipina your visiting and her family. Through them you will learn a great deal. Have fun with it. Be as curious as a child ask a lot of questions and once again…have fun. This is the best way to understand the Filipino culture.
I’m sure you’re asking…what do I do then..If I can’t keep what I have grown up with and won’t understand what’s going on around me?
The answer can as simple as you wish and as complicated as you make it. I chose to keep it simple.
But don’t take my word for anything use your own gut feelings. I can only write what I know worked for me. When you finish this article you’ll realize what you have just read is “dead on the money!”and makes sense. If not…don’t use it.
In each and every one of us is a compass.
- Morals and Values compass
- Safety compass…and
- Curiosity
When you’re in another country such as the Philippines you must always remember what was said may not be what was meant.
Everyone on the face of this earth communicates by using their own morals and values. Everyone prioritizes those value differently. Just because someone tells you yes…be it here in USA or in Philippines it does not always mean what you may think.
A Filipino may tell you yes because he or she doesn’t want to “lose face.” They might mean I don’t know or are too polite to tell you NO. Does this mean they are lying to you? Not necessarily even if it appears that way. Pride or having a good appearing in the eyes of others is important in the Filipino culture. Very important.
Someone may tell you “yes” when they don’t really have an answer for you….YET. If they were to give you an answer and it was wrong that would cause them to lose face. I know what you’re thinking…wouldn’t telling me yes, when they don’t really know, cause them to lose face because it wasn’t the truth?
Not always and here’s why.
If they told you “I don’t know” you might, in their mind, consider them to be ignorant. Who on earth wants to be considered stupid? Especially by a guest of your country or your home?
Do you? I doubt it.
We usually want to put our best foot forward don’t we? You do, I do, we all do.
Now the question is….
How to use your moral compass and common sense to enjoy your stay in the Philippines?
“Seek first to understand then to be understood”
Steven Covey “7 habits of highly effective people.”
I learned early on if I’m being told yes and I don’t feel like I’m being understood ask…
“do you know what I mean when I say __________?”
Then ask “what do you think I mean?” and listen to their answer.
For good measure I’ll do a little face saving my self by prefacing my question with…
“please don’t think I’m being rude or disrespectful…OK… may ask what do you think I mean when I say________?”
If they understand.. you’re successful and you can enjoy the rest of your visit.
If not repeat the request and explain in detail what you mean or want…and have a lot of patience…and remember
It’s not the end of the world. You’re there to enjoy yourself…learn a thing or two…and probably meet the love of your life. If it’s not a matter of life and death everything else takes second stage.
By no stretch of the imagination am I telling you to accept Liars, cheaters, or any other behavior that is against your moral principles. Use your gut feelings if you don’t feel right about something and run everything through these 6 filters.
1.Be patient
2.Seek to understand first..then to be understood
3.Repeat #1 and #2 when necessary
4.Put everything in it’s proper perspective…again
5.Remember rule #1 and #2
6.If you still feel uncomfortable…just say NO and walk away.
If there’s ever any question in your mind about these 6 filters….write them 1000 times on a blackboard until you can explain them to a 13 year old, in your sleep and even drunk. After all it worked in 3rd grade didn’t it?
Of course it did.
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