Internet dating tips for the Filipinas..Part 2
Posted on November 5, 2006
Filed Under Long Distance Relationships |
Ladies,
The first thing you need to remember is a simple but often overlooked aspect of the internet and internet dating. And that is anyone can be whoever they want to be. We can literraly recreate ourselves with a simple point and click of the mouse.
Anonymity has drawn all sorts of folks with ill intentions and Internet dating is no exception.
What I want to do here is speak frankly with anyone that wants to hear my words and protect themselves and their heart. These are mostly common sense tips and not fool proof but if you use them to protect yourself it could very well save you from a broken heart or worse.
I hope you appreciate the frankness and the intentions behind this particular article and take it with the spirit that is was written in.
The internet if full of men that want to hurt women both physically and emotionally. Yes you can find the love of your life on the internet but you must remember just like in the Philippines you must be careful with your heart. Don’t allow an American man to do what u wouldn’t allow a Filipino man to do.
If the man is fast to commit to you and wants to marry you…you must stop and wonder……why? Kano men don’t try to marry Kana after just a few weeks of dating..they aren’t even getting warmed up in the relationship.
What is going to make you any different?
Could it be possible that he has nothing going for him here in USA and loves the attention that you’re giving him? Why wouldn’t he your malambing at maganda and any man would love to have that in his life. He could let it lead him to do stupid things in an internet relationship too. but right now I’m talking to you the Filipina!
If he spends a lot of time online, day and night, that is a good indication that he is unemployed. You must ask him what is his work! That is assuming you want him to be employed and not lazy.
IF the man is too slow to commit to you…you must stop and wonder….why? This is the dangerous area and you must use a balance of common sense and wisdom before approaching this. I beleive that if he is “serious” with you then he needs to come to visit within a few months. and if not then you need a very good reason why!
When he does come to see you It does not mean he is marriage material or even friend material. Once again treat him as you would a Pinoy that wanted to court you.
But this is another subject for a later date.
If he is married Do not entertain him at all! It doesn’t matter how “miserable” he is with his wife. If he is married and still living with his wife he is using you for a pastime. Dump him and dump him right away! “Saving” him from his current misery will only add misery to your life and not remove misery from his.
It might come as shock to some of the Filipinas reading this but married men , when they want to play around and cheat, know that some women will always want to make him happy and rescue him from his problems. And these are the women that he will use for his personal selfish benefit and leave you hurt and use. Just stay away!
If he tells you he is divorced…ask to see his divorce decree before he comes to visit you. And even then make him come to visit you several times before you marry him or give yourself to him.
Yes, its expensive to visit the Philippines but no more expensive than any other “serious” 2 or 3 week vacation. The biggest cost to him is the airline ticket and everything else is more than affordable.
If he complains of the cost to come visit you but he tells you he loves you and wants to marry you. If he complains of the cost to visit you and that is a reason he doesn’t want to visit and get to know you.
That just proves he is not the right man for you…Love takes sacrifice from both the Kano and Filipina…and the Kano needs to be ready to sacrifice in order to prove his love for you.
And the Filipina must be prepared to prove her love by waiting and making him prove himself. Proving your love is not giving your body to him but more so your love,devotion and patience.
One final thought in closing….An internet relationship has in all honesty replaced the Pen Pal that we used to have years ago when people would sit down and actually write letters back and forth to each other.
Yes there are people that used to do that and I personally beleive it’s a dying form of communication. I write to my Girlfriend often and probably more so by hand than in Email. I enjoy it and it gives a sense of personal commitment for someone to handwrite a letter rather than type.
Doesn’t it?
Good luck and God bless you all.
Tags: Fil-Am relationships Filipina Dating Long Distance Relationships Filipinas
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3 Responses to “Internet dating tips for the Filipinas..Part 2”
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wonderful post — it seems we have very similar interests and I commend you for your courage to speak out. I have not been to your beautiful land but would like to be able to do so some day…. please respond….. Rod Smith
thank you Rod,
If you plan to visit the Philippines stick around, visit the forums I have listed and feel too ask questions or make suggestion.
I am not a Filipino I am American with experience in the Philippines and with Filipinas.
I don’t like to mince words and seldom do but thank you for the “courage” comment. I don’t know if it’s courage but thanks anyway.
Your advice to Filipinas is right on the money…but let’s not forget that American men have to be careful too when dealing with some of the Filipinas.It works both way. Truth is,you can have a horrible relationship with someone you meet at church.